Today I want to talk about forgiveness.
I want to talk about how important it is to truly forgive.
It can be a total stranger, your best friend or even yourself, but here’s the thing about forgiveness. Forgiving is a process the same as grieving is a process.
You can move through forgiveness quickly or sometimes it takes a while to forgive.
After a lot of soul work, some people learn how to forgive sooner or later but I think that the most important part of moving to forgiveness is to learn the lesson that the pain teaches you.
The other day I saw a video on Facebook about 10 things you should forgive but never forget . . . . . . . . . . . Huh?
In my opinion and experience, forgiveness doesn’t work like that.
Love doesn’t work like that.
In relationships, whether it is a friendship or a marriage, we love in spite of the times we have been hurt or angry. When someone says I’m sorry we take them at their word. We forgive them. We don’t constantly bring it up to them or remind them that they did it. That is not true forgiveness.
Forgiveness is for us as much as it is for the person that hurt us.
Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves.
Forgiveness is a release of hurt and anger and a forward step.
If we say we forgive someone but drag the pain behind us everyplace we go in life, we didn’t forgive them and what happens is that instead of letting go of the pain, we carry it with us. We might brag that we forgave, we might convince ourselves we forgave but as long as we are dragging it behind us, even if it’s in a very tiny box….we have not learned the lesson…until we let it go.
There are going to be many times in this life that we have to forgive. Some times are going to be harder than others. Some times are going to be harder to let go of than others but love looks forward. We can’t move forward while the past drags us down.
It’s a brand new year to learn new lessons, improve our lives and heal our hurts.
Forgive………….learn the lesson and forget.